Our Birth Story

This post will be lengthy – I want to share my whole experience, so feel free to skip it if you like!

Our little girl was due on 15th November, but as per my last post that date came and went with no sign of impending labour. I had an appointment with my midwife Marilyn on the 16th, who suggested making a time with my OBGYN to discuss induction. I had that appointment on the 19th, and he was willing to induce me the next day. I said I’d actually prefer to wait it out a little longer, since I’d only be 5 days over my due date at that point which I didn’t think was allowing enough time for baby to make her own way out, plus I didn’t like the idea of induction which can lead to a cascade of interference, and all I wanted out of my birth experience at this point was to be able to do it on my own if I could. So we agreed the following Monday (26th) would be induction day, giving our little girl a total of 11 days past my due date to make her own way.

We had Jonah’s (our nephew) birthday party on the 24th – that morning I’d woken up with some small pains but nothing dramatic, but I did lose my mucus plug. Upon calling the maternity ward to let them know, they said without contractions or broken waters, labour could be within the next 24 hours or within the next 2 weeks. So we went along to Jonah’s party and I didn’t have any further signs of anything happening until the next morning, where I started having very mild contractions about 10 minutes apart. After a shower, the contractions eased to about 15 minutes apart, then 30 minutes apart, then disappeared almost completely.

At 4:30 Monday morning (induction day), I woke up very uncomfortable and couldn’t get back to sleep, so I got up and went to sit in the loungeroom.  Almost immediately, I had some relatively strong contractions. The first two or three were about 7 minutes apart, followed by the next two or three being 15 minutes apart, but then they started hitting hard between 2-5 minutes apart. I woke up Michael and asked him to come sit with me in the lounge as I was feeling a bit anxious, but I didn’t even get to sitting down before the contractions hit harder.

I called the ward, where luckily Marilyn was on duty and answered. I told her the details and she said she’d get things ready for us. Michael called my mum (who was my second support person and our taxi!) and she came to get us. On the half-hour drive to the hospital, my contractions regulated out to about 4-5 minutes apart, with an occasional “aftershock” contraction between the bigger ones.

We arrived at the hospital at about 6:30am (the exact time I’m not sure of but I’m guessing it was about then!) and Marilyn hooked me up to the CTG machine to measure how far apart my contractions were and make sure baby wasn’t in any distress. Everything was good, the CTG confirmed my contractions were about 4 minutes apart, so Marilyn examined me to find I was 5 centimetres dilated. This made me super happy because I knew then that I was halfway there already, and so far I’d done it all by myself. By this point it was about 7:15am (judging from my Facebook updates!), meaning if I hadn’t gone into labour myself, I would have been coming into hospital for induction in 45 minutes’ time! So thankfully, our girl was helping us out and saving me the worry and stress of induction.

I stood around and swayed, rocked, and breathed my way through my contractions. They gradually got stronger and stronger. Around 8am I got into the birthing tub, which initially relaxed me and helped ease the pain of the contractions, but as they got stronger, the water didn’t really help any. At this point I asked for some pain relief, so we started with gas & air, which didn’t really help the pain but it did help me catch my breath and take deeper breaths. Marilyn examined me again and found I was 8-9 centimetres, and told me if I was going to have baby in the tub then they’d need to up the temperature of the bath water to 37 degrees. I was already feeling hot and almost a little sick so I didn’t want the temperature increased – Marilyn suggested I get up and try to empty my bladder, to help make a bit more room for bub, but as I started to get up, the contractions just hit me one after the other and I could barely get up out the tub. I squatted back down in the tub before getting out and Marilyn put the back of the birthing bed up so I could kneel on the bed and face the wall behind, slinging my arms over the back. This was a relatively comfortable position and let gravity help the process along too.

A few more minutes in this position with gas & air, and I found myself needing to push. Marilyn examined me one more time and said we’re ready to get this baby out, I was a full 10 centimetres dilated and ready to rock’n'roll! I took a few deep breaths on the gas & air and pushed with all my might – it was a very strange feeling: you want to push with the contraction (and the pushing eases the pain of the contraction), but the pain “downstairs” is pretty intense so you’re kind of between a rock and a hard place.

I don’t remember much else at this point except pushing at least two big pushes with every contraction – and I do recall between contractions feeling like I’d gone two steps forward, one step back because I could feel baby’s head coming through, but then retract back in.

Finally, when my Marilyn said, “Let’s get this baby out, Terri! You can do it! I can see her head!”, I knew I had to do this. I bore down and pushed with all my might, and with some pretty excruciating pain, her head popped out. I remember screaming “Ow ow ow ow, it hurts, it hurts!”, and Michael told me a few hours later that this was the only point that he was really worried and scared for me, but luckily my mum was there to give him a reassuring look.

With my next contraction, out came the rest of her (another very strange feeling – it felt like my insides fell out!) and Marilyn (after initially checking her over and cleaning her off just a little) told me to sit up and passed our baby girl between my legs. When I saw her, I just couldn’t believe it – a little person lay on the bed before me! I immediately picked her up and held her close to my chest, just exclaiming “Oh my god! Oh my god!” over and over again (I remember looking at her hands and thinking "Fingernails! She has fingernails! I hadn't even thought about fingernails!").  Michael cried (as I expected him to!), and I don’t think I even looked at my mum at all; it was all about our little girl. At about this point, there was a knock at the door – my dad and my nan had arrived – so we just asked them to wait about 10 minutes while we got sorted!

I had requested that the cord be allowed to stop pulsating before clamping and cutting so about 5 minutes after her birth, Michael cut the cord. I was given the injection to help birth the placenta (I had to help by pushing a little as the cord was apparently quite thin), and then handed baby over to my hubby to hold while I turned around and Marilyn and another midwife (who I didn’t even know was there for the last part of my labour!) cleaned me and the bed up so I could sit down and have skin-to-skin with baby.

Once I was all covered up, my dad and nan came in. They couldn’t believe that as they’d walked through the front door, their granddaughter and great-granddaughter had been born. Baby latched on to my breast within about 15-20 minutes of being born – this was an amazing bonding experience that I would not have changed for the world.

Photos were taken, and she was taken off and weighed, measured, cleaned up and dressed. I was allowed to get up and go to have a shower, then we were walked down to the ward where I would stay for the next couple of days. We came home on Wednesday 28th November  

So, introducing…

Lily Fae
26th November 2012
Time:  10:33am (6 hour labour!)
Weight:  7lb 9oz
Height: 52.3cm

Thank you to everyone for their well wishes, congratulations, support and blessings – we are over the moon to have our own little bundle of joy!

40 Weeks, 6 Days

Tomorrow I will be 41 weeks pregnant.

I really had hoped that our little girl would have made her way into the world by now.  I know, I know - due dates are only a guide and babies can be born 2 weeks either side of that date, etc. etc.

I guess being that for the past 9 months, all I've been able to think about is having a baby, and now that it's finally here and the build-up has come to a peak and it's all very exciting, all I want is to be holding her in my arms and cuddling her and being a little family.  I said, after my stint in hospital, that she'd either come early or, more likely, keep us waiting after everything we've been through.  The latter seems to have been proven! 

And it makes it more difficult when people keep saying "Just relax, let go, it'll be fine, she'll make it here"  - like I said, for the last 9 months this pregnancy has been my life, all I can think about, and now that the time has finally arrived, it's hard to just let that go and let be what will be.

I have "ideals" for my birthing experience, and while I know the world (particularly unpredictables like giving birth) does not run to ideals but will run how it will run, it would be nice to know that at least some of my wishes could be granted.  For example, being able to have a water birth.  If I have to be induced (I'm scheduled in for induction on Monday 26th should she not arrive by herself by then), then chances of my being able to have a water birth are reduced.  And induction runs the risk of a cascade of interference - firstly they'll try gel, then they'll try breaking my waters if that doesn't work, and then an IV of pitocin, and finally there's the possibility of being taken in for an emergency C-Section.  Each of those steps takes me further and further from my "ideal" experience.

I know that I should just be grateful for the chance to have a baby at all - that she's healthy and grows well and all that - and trust me, I am.  It would, however, be nice to have it all run to a natural beat, rather than a medical one.

38 Weeks Update

Lack of updates, sorry guys.  Have been busy with finishing up at work and other commitments!

Weight Gain: Total of around 8kg, after initial loss of 7kg.

Innie or Outtie: Still rockin' the innie - don't think it'll pop :P

Maternity Clothes: Pants yes, tops not really - I still fit into most of my old tops (but most of them are bigger and baggy anyway.

Sleep: Terrible night's sleep last night but generally pretty good.  My usual pattern is two "bad" nights (ie waking up more than twice) followed by one good night.

Pregnancy Perk: People helping me! The cashier at the supermarket was very helpful, and the lady I purchased M's anniversary present from carried it out to my car even though I insisted I'd be fine with it :P

Embarrassing Pregnant Moment:  None that I can think of!

Best Moment this week: No real "best" moments - just knowing it's not long till we get to meet you.

Baby Purchases this week: First Christmas outfit :D

Gender: GIRL STILL!

Movement: Gives me a few good bashes every now and then but has definitely settled down into a pattern (although I'm still working out what that pattern is).

Food Cravings: Nothing really.

Food Aversions:  Still bacon!

How’s Mummy? Getting a little over being pregnant and just want to meet our little girl already - hoping you'll show up before your due date but who knows - just want it to be done!

How’s Daddy? Daddy's good, also getting anxious to meet you in person - he's so lovely, says "I love you" to both me and you when he leaves for work <3

What I am looking forward to: ARRIVAL DAY! 

Our Baby in Veggie/Fruit Terms: Baby is now the size of a watermelon, approximately 3.5 - 4kg and 50cm in length.

What Baby Peanut is up to: The last bits of vernix caseosa (the white goo keeping baby's skin moist) and lanugo (downy hair) are slowly shedding into your amniotic fluid. Baby's head is about the same circumference as her abdomen, and her head could be covered in an inch or so of hair.

34 Week (and 3 Days) Update

I've now been home for 3 weeks and things are looking pretty good!

The Monday before last, I had an appointment with my OBGYN, who said it was fine for me to return to work after my stint in Hobart, and that there was no longer any sign of the clot on my placenta. I don't need to see him again until 7th November!

This Thursday just been, I had an appointment with my midwife, had my second Anti--D shot, checked on bub's heartrate and my growth (both of which are spot-on perfect).  She didn't see any reasons for concern about heading forward at this point, which is VERY exciting considering we've had a bit of a rough time!

Yesterday was the Baby Shower, hosted by my awesome mum, and it was great! We were SO spoilt with gifts, it was unreal!  I feel so overwhelmed with love and support right now, it's just amazing.  We had an awesome afternoon tea with fun games and lots of laughs, yummy food and fantastic company - I couldn't have asked for a more enjoyable afternoon.

I have so much sorting to do and a final sweep of the baby's room to clear out the last bit of mess before it's completely finished and I can finally post photos for everyone - I'm itching to show you all the room but not before it's perfect!

34 Week Stats Update:

Weight Gain: Total of about 6kg, after the initial loss of 7kg.

Innie or Outtie: Still an innie!

Maternity Clothes: When I'm out-and-about, definitely.  But at home, I can still fit fine into most of my t-shirts and pants :)

Sleep: Sleeping okay, just waking up with a dead leg every so-often, and finding it difficult to get to sleep in the first place.  A normal night now involves waking up maybe once every couple of hours.

Pregnancy Perk: I have to say the attention, don't I?!  And being able to eat whatever I want without excuses :P

Embarrassing Pregnant Moment:  None that I can think of!  I don't embarrass easily though!

Best Moment this week: The Baby Shower, for sure - this girl is one spoilt child already!

Baby Purchases this week: None this week, didn't have to!!!

Gender: Still a girl, and we've had pretty much every radiologist confirm this every time we've had a scan!

Movement: Still a wriggly worm.

Food Cravings: Nothing out of the ordinary - I still enjoy strawberries but they're not really a craving at the moment. 

Food Aversions:  Still bacon - can't get my head around it at the moment.

How’s Mummy? Very happy!  Glad that everything's now going smoothly.  My morning sickness has returned but it's really only in the morning and of an evening when I'm trying to get to sleep.  Otherwise, I'm fine.  Things are starting to look positive for the final outcome!

How’s Daddy? He's wonderful - been very supportive and just my rock for the past 3 weeks.  He's been taking the time to relax and play his video games before bub arrives!

What I am looking forward to: Our next midwife appointment, being able to discuss my birth wishlist (it's not a plan! The moment you call it a plan, it's not likely to follow!) and see if she's happy for us to travel down the waterbirth route that I so want.

Our Baby in Veggie/Fruit Terms: Baby is now the size of a butternut squash, approximately 2kg and 45cm in length.

What Baby Peanut is up to: She's filling out and getting rounder -- she'll need her fat layers later to regulate her body temperature. If you've been nervous about going into premature labour, you'll be happy to know that 99 per cent of babies born at week 35 can survive outside the womb -- and most have no major problems. Although your baby's central nervous system is still maturing, her lungs are nearly fully developed by now.

Home!

I'm finally home - they let me come back a week earlier than they anticipated because I'd been asymptomatic for over a week, and my clot (I finally found out it was a retrochorionic haematoma) had disappeared almost completely as of Thursday. The clot itself was 35x59x48mm, which is pretty huge but still less than 5% of the placenta itself.

Retrochorionic haematomas are more common in early pregnancy, but since mine happened in my last trimester, they were obviously quite concerned. Luckily, bubby stayed put but she would have been in the right place had my bleeding not settled.

Alls good so far - have to call my OBGYN tomorrow and make an appointment to see him about continued care, whether I'm still considered high risk, and if I can return to work between now and a couple of weeks before baby is due.

Just happy to be home really

Hotel

On Saturday (8th September) I was released from the hospital and have been staying at a hotel only 5 minutes from the hospital, and am now being treated as an outpatient.

While I thought it would be better to be in a hotel room (my own space, no interruptions, quieter), I almost miss the hospital for the simple fact of company - you're never really alone in hospital, with people coming and going from your room, you almost always have someone to talk to.

Anyway, today I have an appointment at the hospital, in the high risk antenatal clinic, so I'll be heading in there and requesting that I be allowed to go home sooner rather than later - I don't think being away from my family is very helpful.  I have a scan booked in for Friday, I'm hoping that they will agree to let me go at least by the weekend.  I mean, it's my right to refuse any further treatment or attention.

It seems rather cruel and inhumane to keep a 30-week pregnant woman away from her support base for 4 weeks, at the most emotional point she'll ever experience in her entire life.  I only get to see my husband on weekends, which SUCKS majorly, and the occasional family member or friend during the week.  I manage to keep myself occupied, but I still don't think it's the right place for me to be - how can someone heal or rest in an unfamiliar place?

Rambling thoughts from someone who hasn't got a lot of sleep the past 3 weeks.  I don't know.  I just want out.

Knit knit knit

Yesterday we had a visit from one of the nurses in the NICU, who just wanted to have a yack with us about what happens in NICU and that kind of thing.  She's also a lactation consultant so she ran through with me briefly about how to breastfeed and how the milk is produced, etc. which was good to know because I do intend on breastfeeding but because of this interruption in proceedings, we hadn't had a chance to get to antenatal or breastfeeding classes yet.

During our conversation she asked me how I was holding up, if I was keeping myself occupied, etc.  I said yes, in general I'm okay.  If I was on strict bedrest I'd be going completely nuts, but since I am allowed to go out and such, I feel generally okay.  She said she's a knitter and I said that I had been for a while, but sort of let it go by the wayside.  She suggested I start it again, maybe knit something for Bub, and I though it was a brilliant idea.

And it definitely makes the day go quicker - I spent all of today just in my room knitting and watching Grimm (TV series, if you didn't know).  I'm not a skilled knitter but I did manage to pull off a good chunk of a baby blanket for Bub:

Doesn't really look quite right here because it's 100 stitches squished onto the one needle, but you get the idea.

There's been a couple of mishaps with one or two dropped stitches, and the time I had to undo about 6 rows because I'd purled instead of knitted at the start of a couple, but other than that it's looking quite cute and I'm really pleased with how it's turning out - I can't wait to wrap my little bubba in it, and tell her later on (when she understands) that I knitted it just for her while I was in the hospital, wondering if she'd decide to be born early or not.

It's been quite therapeutic and a good use of time.  I'm excited to get it finished - and I still have two weeks to do it in.

Tomorrow's schedule is another ultrasound, in which they'll check how Bub is growing - I read today online with some research that if she's not grown any more since my last scan two weeks ago, that I might be in for a C-Section - so let's hope she's grown that little extra that tells them she's a 30 week old and not a 28 week old anymore!